Saturday, February 19, 2011

How We Grow Patience

Recently we have been reading chapter six on patience which, in my opinion, is the most critical chapter in the book.  It begins with this:
All the good works gathered in a thousand ages,
Such as deeds of generosity,
And offerings to the Blissful Ones-
A single flash of anger shatters them.
No evil is their similar to anger,
No austerity is there similar to patience.
Steep yourself, therefore, in patience,
In various ways, insistently. 

From this passage, we can sense the imperative to cultivate the type of patience that can defeat our anger.  This is a very large goal for most of us and can be off putting.  In our fast moving society, which focuses on immediate gratification, we have many opportunities to practice patience every day in smaller ways.  We can prepare our minds to deal with the larger challenges of anger and hatred which are harder to tackle by practicing on the smaller annoying or frustrating inconveniences of life.  This is a practical and doable way to grow our capacity for patience.

I overheard a person talking to his friend on the El a couple weeks ago about how annoyed he was when the person in front of him on the escalator blocked his way and prevented him from walking up.  He confessed that he was in no rush on this occasion and didn't even know why he was so annoyed.  We are often habitually impatient because this is encouraged by the world around us.  However, we can choose to be mindful and to respond with patience instead of frustration or exasperation.

Keeping this practice in mind may help to make us calmer and more relaxed.  This will not not only train us to not get upset habitually but will also spread a little more calm in a world which desperately needs it.  In the comments section share your stories of being impatient in everyday life, or moments when you realized you were being impatient and changed it.

3 comments:

  1. I must admit I felt a flash of anger when reading "A single flash of anger shatters them." Ties in to the attachment in my mind to "perfection as being the only option". While I agree that anger can definitely get in the way of, and even destroy, skillful means I believe that anger can be useful in the relative plane of day to day life. When I feel anger, as energy, I can use it to focus and assert myself skillfully. I find this especially important when setting limits with people. My new anger practice (when I'm not sleep walking) is to fully feel into the anger, even "get into character with it" (in my mind) while - in the background - send compassion to the person(s) of my anger. If I don't re-cycle the energy it gets repressed and tends to jump out at others later, or towards myself in judgmental self-talk. Ultimately I like Pema Chodron's philosophy of "pounding the stake down" to the spot of strong emotions and exploring them. Keep exploring!

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  2. I think Shantideva's point is to drive home the fact that you should aspire to be free of the true feeling of anger. At least we can generate the intention of being free from it. Anger can produce a lot of energy, but if it is really anger driving us, we cannot truly control that energy. It is good to explore anger and analyze its causes within ourselves with the ultimate goal of realizing through and through its illusionary nature. There would be no feeling of anger without us bringing it to life.

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  3. There's that story about D.T. Suzuki, where someone asks him, "Isn't it true that anger can sometimes be like a pure wind, blowing everything clean?" His answer: "Yes, but I don't think you need to worry about that."

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